Talking the Talk

© pink fish13

So I was slabbing it to Tucson and this squid blasted by me on his rice burner, just in time for me to watch him low-side as he dodged a cage that didn’t look for him. Good thing for him he had a bucket but I definitely don’t envy him the road rash.

Er...What?

It’s only natural that to be a cultural icon you’ve got to have your own specialized vocabulary. And there aren’t many cultural icons more in vogue today than the biker. Having finally shed the negative image of the 1950s, bikers today are the ultimate in cool. The following is an abbreviated glossary of common terms that every rider – or wannabe rider – should know.

Types of Bikers

Squid – An acronym for SQUirrely kID. A derogatory term used by other bikers for young hot-shots on sport bikes riding beyond their skill level.

RUB – An acronym for rich urban biker. A derogatory term for riders of high-priced bikes who are more interested in appearing cool and hip than in actually riding. Also known as a poser.

One Percenters – Hard-core bikers belonging to organized clubs. Often considered “outlaws” and seen as “the 1 percent who give the other 99 percent of us a bad name.” Also known as “patch holders” for the club insignia they wear.

Trailer Twinkie – A motorcycle owner who hauls his bike to rallies on a trailer instead of riding it there.

Biker – A person who leads a lifestyle that revolves around motorcycles. In a more narrow definition, one for whom being part of the brotherhood and sisterhood of all motorcycle riders is paramount, as is sharing traditional attitudes about the code of the road.

Safety Slang

ATGATT – An abbreviation for All The Gear, All The Time. An admirable philosophy for the safety-oriented hard-core, but ignored by most riders, especially in blazing hot weather.

Bucket / Brain Bucket / Lid – A helmet. States that require helmets are called “bucket states.”

Organ Donor – A rider who doesn’t wear a helmet. A term generally used by proponents of ATGATT.

Get Off – Taking leave of your bike, at speed. Also known as a crash.

High Side – A crash where a biker is thrown forward over the bike. One type of get off.

Low Side – A crash where the bike slides out from under the rider. Another type of get off.

Chicken Strips – The remaining tread on the sidewalls of a sport bike’s tires. The further the rider leans, the more the chicken strips are eaten away. The larger the chicken strips, the more “chicken” the rider.

Endo – Stopping with enough force on the front brake that the rear wheel comes off the ground. Also called a “stoppie.” Considered stunting when executed properly. Only falls into the safety category when executed poorly such that the back end keeps on going and the bike flips end over end.

Road Rash – The injury to your skin as you slide down the pavement following a get off.

Broken Wings – A patch often worn by cruiser riders who have survived severe crashes and gotten back on to ride again.

Types of Motorcycles

UJM – A universal Japanese motorcycle. A term coined in the late 1960s when all the Japanese manufacturers were turning out nearly identical inline-four streetbikes. Japanese motorcycles are often referred to in general as “rice burners.”

Inline Four – A four-cylinder engine with the cylinders  all in a line. Usually mounted in the frame such that the line of the cylinders is perpendicular to the frame. High-performance bikes tend to be inline fours.

V-Twin – A two-cylinder engine with the cylinders forming a “V” where the base of the V is the crankshaft. Usually mounted in the same plane as the frame. Cruisers, such as Harley-Davidson’s, tend to be V-twins.

Cruiser – A low-sitting bike intended for easygoing riding. Usually a V-twin.

Crotch Rocket – A slang term for a sport bike. Sport bikes are generally high-performance inline fours covered with plastic body work and characterized by rear-set foot pegs and requiring a forward lean to reach the grips. Not recommended for extended highway travel.

Naked Bike – A bike with no fairing or other coverings. On a naked bike the engine is fully visible.

Bagger – A bike designed for long-distance travel that comes with luggage compartments.

Thumper – A single-cylinder motorcycle. With only one large cylinder, a thumper has more of a beat to the engine, as opposed to the very smooth feel of an inline four.

Gear and Parts

Swing Arm – The rigid element attaching the rear wheel to the frame. The swing arm rides up and down and is one element in the motorcycle’s suspension.

Soft Tail/Hard Tail – Bikes with rear suspension/no rear suspension.

Ape Hangers – Handlebars that rise significantly upward. At the extreme, the rider’s grips are above their head.

Windshield/Fairing – The wind screen protecting the rider from wind and flying objects. A windshield is generally just a piece of plastic that blocks the wind. A fairing provides more extensive coverage and is likely to have pockets and compartments for storage, as well as places to install CD players and speakers, GPS units, and similar items.

Sissy Bar – The passenger back rest.

Panniers – Saddle bags positioned on opposite sides of the rear wheel.

Pillion – The passenger’s seat.

Lungs/Jugs – Engine cylinders.

Dry Weight/Wet Weight – A measurement of motorcycle weight, either with or without fluids. Dry weight is meaningless because you’ll never ride a motorcycle dry.

On the Road

Cager – A motorist in a car. The biker rides free in the breeze while the cager sits trapped inside his steel cage.

Super Slab – The interstate. Touring bikers prefer the two-lane over the interstate for their more leisurely pace and better scenery. Slabbing it generally implies a need or desire to cover a lot of distance in a hurry.

Riding Bitch – Riding as a passenger on a motorcycle. It takes a man with a lot of self-confidence to ride bitch behind his woman.

Helmet Hair – What wearing a helmet leaves you with. No hairdo can survive a helmet.

Lane Splitting – Riding between stopped or slow-moving cars in heavy traffic. In the U.S., only legal in California, but standard procedure in most of the rest of the world.

Duck Walking – Straddling the bike and paddling along with your feet, usually in a parking lot.

Whoops – A section of track or road with a series of mounds or moguls. Paved roads rarely have whoops, except where severe weather causes serious road damage. Whoops are frequently found in dirt and are a dirt rider’s delight.

Tar Snakes – the tar patching that road crews put down in cracks in the pavement. In hot weather the tar softens and oozes out, making a very slick patch for a biker in a turn.

Scraping Hard Parts – Leaning so far in a turn that your foot pegs or other parts scrape the road surface. Cruisers sit low and scrape easily. Sport bikes are designed for extreme leans. The only thing you’re likely to scrape on a sport bike is the hard plastic puck sewn onto your knee as you lean off the bike, allowing it to stay more upright and thereby maintain better traction.